the most miserable person on earth

The person with this laptop is leaving today so... this is the last post until I leave detox. I finally figured something out. I could be in the finest resort, in Hawaii (or south beach?), drinking fancy drinks, relaxing, getting massages, eating steak and crab legs and candy all day, and if I wasn't shooting dope I would be the most miserable person on earth. Isn't that the craziest shit? That is the only thing that makes me happy. Well, perhaps not the ONLY thing. But nothing else can make me happy unless it is preceded by a fat shot. How pathetic does that make me?

Pretty fucking pathetic, if you ask me...

Well I just got my meds twice in like... an hour. I guess they're slipping. But no matter what they give me, it won't stop- the ache, the shakes, the jones, the dopesick/dopeseeking, the itch, the monkey on my back, whatever you want to call it. I need heroin. And a needle. For those of you who didn't hear correctly-

I need heroin!!!

But I can't get any until stupid Wednesday. Greg has my 2 bags waiting for me, but only if I finish my week here!!! My tracks are going away, it's awesome, and my veins are coming back, I'm all excited about it. But all my mind is saying is

bangbangbang

I wish they detoxed with methadone here. I'm halfway crawled out of my skin, my cellphone is finally charged, add another random thought and it would be a Neil Diamond song.

GUN CLUB-TYPE COUNTDOWN: 2 more days (because after all it's after 3 so today doesn't count)