Sunday, November 30, 2008

smack *does* make more interesting stories

Last "post" has a comment that I am boring now. It's quite true, I'll admit it. The reason I started this blog two years ago is because so much crazy shit happened, a lot of it completely unbelievable, that I just had to publish it. It would be a true story that read like fiction, and every time some other shit went down I could add to the craziness. Fast forward to now, nothing really exciting happens anymore. Do I miss the excitement? Fuck yeah! Am I sorry my life is boring now? Fuck no! I'm happier now than I have been in a long time. I posted this over at but I can also say it here: some of the happiest times of my life have been because of drugs, but ALL of the most miserable times of my life have been because of drugs. Of course I had fun sometimes, and I was miserable sometimes. Now I'm not miserable at all. Smack *does* make more interesting stories though... no doubt.
Greg has disappeared. He dropped me off on Thursday after having a little Thanksgiving dinner for just our family (me, him, and Little J) and we weren't even fighting. Friday he didn't call at all, and Saturday he was supposed to come over for the big Thanksgiving dinner and he not only didn't show, he didn't even answer my phone calls. My haters will say, "maybe he's sick of your shit." While that could be true, he isn't the type to get angry and just ignore me. No, when he gets a bug up his ass about something I did, he harps on it overandoverandover and absolutely will NOT stop talking about it! Blowing off plans and then giving me the silent treatment? Very much not like him. To tell the truth, I'm kinda worried about him. I'm driving by his house today, so if she who shall not be named is reading, knows what's going on and doesn't want me coming by, give me a call please! Also if Greggie is reading this... please call me! I am scared for you! : ( : (


Anonymous said...

That first picture is great. Stay centered, stay well.

Stephanie said...

Keep your head up, sister.

I predicted this would happen but never wished it for you. You are in an emotionally fragile state, having just given birth.

You need to focus on YOU and Jaz ... she needs you to be strong, most of all.

Greg always starts out his commenting with "Hey Gorgeous" so his latest comment was yesterday. Jokes. Not, "Hey, how are you? I miss you. I love you. Sorry I've been away. How's the baby?" ... they were jokes. Bad ones at that.

Actions speak louder than words, they always do. It's a harsh lesson to learn and I know you are in love, but don't let love blind you ... it only sets you up for future failure.

The writing is on the wall. He is fine and most likely back at his 'ex'-wife's home.

You need to look out for number one and your lil' offspring. That's all you need to look out for because obviously, he's not looking out for you, he's merely looking out for himself. SHOCKER!

You and the bebe are in my thoughts.

Anonymous said...

Loved the pictures especially the one of you feeing her. She looks great and you look great!

As for Greg, hopefully he is okay. I can understand why you're worried.

Yeah. Drugs do make for some interesting stories but I am glad you are embracing a more stable peaceful life. The picture of you feeding her says it all. You are her lifeline.

not be named one said...

I will never tell you to not come by the house, if I'm stress out I tell Greg to take you to a nice restaurant, go to the movies, something like that. I didn't know what's going on, I though you went to visit family or something.

Yesterday, I went to the car to say Hi to Jaz and your brother, but your brother was kind of sleeping, so I didn't want to disturb the 2 babies napping.

I hope you are ok.
You are not boring at all and we want to know Jasmyne adventures and yours as a mother (which you are doing a fantastic job).

Melody said...

You both look great, I'm gonna try and call you in a bit. Love you lots and talk to ya soon.
P.S hope things are OK with G.

jamie said...

great pics thanks , i hope greg shows up , if not , there will be another for you . thats what i tell my daughters , they never buy it i hope you do ? you look great and thats what really matters anyway . the baby is so cute , the lil peanut !

Anonymous said...

This is a good reason to stay off the sh*t!

So maybe your smack days were more interesting for us, the readers, BUT one simple remedy, is retelling the stories from yesterday (not literally yesterday but you get my drift).

naomi said...

look at those beautiful big eyes! they grow so quick its amazing.

i think you should try writing a book! what do you think? that way you can relive everything you have done, close that chapter in your life ? (i presume you want to), hopefully get some good dollar and give others an opportunity to look behind the typical junkie image. just a thought, i would buy it. take care girl,
n x

Victoria said...

Look at that beautiful girl! You are so blessed to have such a wonderful, perfect, and healthy baby. And you look sooo good, girl! It seems like everything is getting better for you by the day...

Also, I finally figured out the whole "follow" a blog thing... haha, took me a while. But I added you to the list of blogs that I follow, just so you know :)

♥ Tori

taxitalk said...

so its as good as it get, I bet I can say I told you so, My old lady kicked me out but my sun is my only joy, peace and love to your new family, fuck you'll have to comment on my blog or itll take a while for me to come back

Anonymous said...

Shelley, I saw your post on ophile about the arthritis - just to let you know, I just got diagnosed with it in both knees, too. The doctors pretty much suggested the stuff that the other posters already said - NSAIDs, ice for swelling, and....losing some weight. I've always been normal weight, but after I got on subs, I put on 20lbs. Any extra weight just puts more pressure on the knees. Since running is too hard on them, (with the extra fat) for now, they suggested swimming. I was hoping they'd script something decent, but nope! I think we're not going to get anything good for that, until we're like, 90.

Anonymous said...

Your life may be boring, but you have a beautiful daughter. Glad you are happy!

LilyGirl said...

Jaz is getting sooo big, and she is soo beautiful, both of you look great, I hope you find out what happend to Greg, I kinda hope something did happen (not bad or anything) but just so you don't have to wonder why he would just disappear..Anyway keep doin good girlie..Much love..

beautiful disaster said...

that is one adorable baby...she will bring a whole new dimension of excitement to life. drugs may make for good stories, but once you put them down, you find an alternate definition of fun. when i was clean, i went hiking, camping, brought my younger brother to the skate park, had breakfast w my mom. i wrote a ton, read so many books, and did tons of yoga. all things i knew i liked, but i enjoyed it all so much more sober. simple boring stuff, but it was great