I haven't felt like writing in a while... I think it's partly the meds I'm on, partly stress (arguments), and partly total disappointment in myself for going right back where I used to be before I went to detox. There was a stranger, some skinny dude in a white work van, asking my good friend Shane where I was.
"Come on dude, I've seen you with her dozens of times. Do you know she just got out of rehab and she's back to the same old shit?"
Turns out, we've never officially met. He's seen me walking down the street (a lot of the time with Shane cause he's just the best guy ever) and reads my blog (didn't specify which one..?) and now he's chasing my friends up and down the strip trying to talk to me and I guess scare me straight like that TV show [[scared straight]]. I need to stay away from psychotic assholes. Maybe I shouldn't have pictures on my blog- hell no! I just got a new phone FINALLY and it's a camera phone so the blog pics might change or be added to a lot in the next month or so.
That is, if I have the energy to figure out how to send email from my phone- so far I end up in the same little cycle and it doesn't let me type anything but numbers for email addresses. What a big pain in the ass. I'm glad to have a nice phone now, where I can download and check email and take pics and whatever. My old one is 2 more bounces off the concrete away from just disintegrating in a pile of plastic and dust. Problem is, I bought it off the street for $20 from some crackhead named John and his service isn't cancelled until the 20th. So until then, I'm stuck with my crappy Nokia until I can get that number onto the shiny new Samsung. I'm not changing my number for anyone.
I was away on a road trip to South Carolina with Greg it was fun except for our twice-daily arguments ending with FUCK YOU!!! YOU'RE JUST A HOOKER!! WELL YOU AIN'T SHIT BUT TRANSPORTATION!!! If you don't argue with somoene, you don't really care about them. I believe that from the bottom of my heart.I made a little money. But check it- I was gone 6 days and I didn't even go through the 12 bags I brought with me on the trip. That makes me feel so good about myself...
...gee whiz, Michelle, you're only sticking a needle full of poison directly into your veins twice a day, you must have this thing licked!!!
7 months ago
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