Monday, October 8, 2007

get out there and make some fuckin' money

I haven't done any heroin for 50 hours.

But I have done.. let's see now... 210mg of methadone since day before yesterday at 230pm. Is that too much? I was terrified of getting sick. There's only 3/4 of a wafer left (30mg) which means I'm gonna have to make a buy tonight even if I don't touch it until tommorrow. I can't start out the day with nothing, I just fucking can't, and I know I'm gonna take the rest of that 'done before I go to sleep. That's just my junkyness in action.

I stepped on Kitty today. Not on purpose but I still got pissed at myself.

Greg is a dickwad. I don't owe him shit and he needs to stop. Bursting into my house, telling me what to do with MY shit, yelling at me, laying on my spot on the bed, annoying the hell out of both me and Cat, hiding my drugs, telling me to "get out there and make some fuckin' money bitch" when it's 90 degrees outside, storming out (I guess to prove a point?) and coming back in 2 minutes later, not sharing the weed that I bought him which he smokes out of the bowl that I bought him, demanding money!!! Bitch I suck dick for my money! He needs a job or a life or something to do because I'm sick of listening to him.

I'd do anything for a shot right now. I probably wouldn't feel it, but I miss "the old familiar sting".

3 comments:

sKILLz said...

You took 210mgs at once or over an amount of time? It is kind of alot if you havent ever taken it before or your not doing that much dope.

Michelle said...

What if you are doing "that much dope"?

sKILLz said...

Well if you are doing that much then thats what your body is going to need in order not to feel sick.

I was shooting about 20-25 bags a day and when I got on the meth program 100 was enough for me not to feel sick. There were days when It started wearing off at the night and morning but it did the job most of the time.

when you dont use anything, just drink your meth 9 times out of 10 it will not make you feel sick. Its when you still shoot dope, or take Xanax, or other meds (HIV meds eat away at the meth) that will make you not feel the correct effects of the meth.

holla at me if you wanna talk more!