Thursday, May 8, 2008

sobriety is boring

Um, yeah. A picture taken somewhere on Dixie Highway which is neither recent nor really good. But I have no pics and I'm kind of enjoying putting pics on just about every blog post, so here one is. Greg got some new pictures of me today while I was swimming and they will go up as soon as he gets 'em to me. Greg wants me to go to a counter and tile show in central Florida! Argh! As much as I love going places with him, I don't really want to go to a counter and tile show. Well, I bet we'll find some way to enjoy ourselves... :)
My baby bro came home from college which is cool but all his little friends ("the melvins") came with him which was not cool. The first night, there were like 6 of 'em and I tolerated 'em. The second night, there were like 12 of 'em and I was getting PISSED OFF ! ! ! I had a major bug up my butt, no question about it. They were so fucking loud, plus I was preggo-pissy, plus I hadn't smoked any pot (or used anything else, but then I don't anymore) for a couple days, plus I was lonely and horny- bad combination. I was yelling at the poor bastards, telling them to shut the fuck up and why are they still here, etc. To my credit, it had been 48 hours and they were still here bein' loud. Goddamn melvins! Finally Greg came over and helped me out in all sorts of different ways. We went to the ocean, then ate at IHOP (stuffed french toast kicks ass, even though it's more cake than breakfast), then slept in the parking lot of said IHOP. Nice, huh? While eating Greggie started asking the waitress if IHOP used to be called "the pancake house" and she just stared at him. It was hilarious. That was Friday night.
The rest of the week- hell. Nothing interesting AT ALL. Sobriety is boring. I sprained my shoulder and got tendonitis in it. The chiropractor couldn't even fuck with it cause it was too swollen. That was the interesting part of my week- see what my life has come to? At least I have pot and cigs- without that, I'd probably go crazy. I am off all the psych meds after all...
Oh one thing- I finally felt the baby move. I'm 20 weeks now (5 months) and I felt something like being flicked from the inside. 'Twas very cool!
GOOD SONG OF THE DAY: all my life by Foo Fighters
"Don't you have any non-whore shorts you can wear?"
Oh shit... you must be new to this blog. Allow me to introduce myself: Hi! My name is Michelle and I was a hooker for 4+ years, but I still trick on the side. I live in South Florida where it's 90 degrees on the daily. And the answer to your question? No- HELLS no! My outfit consists of whore shorts, whore skirts, and wife-beaters (whorish ones). That's just the way it is.
"I think that is what really distinguishes the good blogs from the bad. MORE PICS!!!!!! :)"
Thanks! Plus pictures make everything more fun.
"Wondering if you had a pictures of the Sweet corn Fashion show which showcased right before the competions."
Nope... sorry babes.
"Who would have thought, you, corn eating contest. You are full of surprises, arn't you???Loved it...I would never had had the guts to post this. You are so real..Good for you......"
What do you mean by that? Is it embarrassing or something? Honestly, I forget what's embarrassing since it's just about impossible to embarrass me... seriously. I post stuff for strangers to read that "normals" wouldn't discuss with friends. I'm real huh? I try to be. Fake isn't much fun.
"Do you own any clothes besides teeny tiny shorts and tanktops?"
Technically, yes I do- I have pants and hoodies too. But it's hot as shit down here in south Florida, and... wait. Am I explaining my clothing choices to a stranger? What the fuck has gotten into me! I love my tricksuits!
"Well… why does one expose their entire life to the general public in the form of a blog? It’s because they want feedback.If they didn’t want feedback, then it wouldn’t be public.Do you really think Michelle or anybody else has the right to squash anybody else’s opinions in a public forum? The same basic right that allows Michelle the ability to blog whatever she wants is given to same people who feel the need to criticize.If she doesn’t like it, don’t put it out there for others to read."
THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO SAY FOR A YEAR NOW!!!!!! I don't moderate comments, I allow anonymous, I answer flames. Why? Because I do like getting feedback. I don't really mind anyone making fun of what I write, and if there was something I was particularly sensitive about (didn't want trash talked about) I wouldn't post it on this flamer-filled blog. No one has the right to censor anybody else. Thanks Jake for posting this- I think a lot of people who come here need to understand that. You have said some pretty harsh shit to me on here- but that's because you have the absolute god-given fucking RIGHT to speak (type) your mind. Good for you!
"Personally, even though i like Michelles blog I don't really know her. I mean c'mon, she could really be a 80 year old granny in Liverpool freaking England, laughing her little wrinkled Liverpool ass off at us. "
Yes! You figured me out, ya bloody wanker! Get off my lawn! Where's my teeth? Hahahaha! Would this be proof enough: give me something to do or hold or whatever, and I'll take a pic of me doing or holding whatever ya said. Nothing sexual, cause I like staying on this site. Suggestive don't bother me though... I'm not really trying to "prove" anything, I just like games and this sounds like a fun one! Hooray for games!!
"I was at Wal Mart today and I saw your exact pink and white shorts!"
I think it's like a law that all white trash has to buy their (new) clothes at Walmarts. The only other options? Used clothes: thrift stores, garage sales, Salvation Army, rummaging through dead friend's trailers, etc. Keeping with that law, yes, my shorts did come from Walmarts. Don't tell me yer surprised.


Radiator said...

Hey Shelley...

I linked to your blog... hopefully it will send some more traffic your way. Love your raw, undiluted shit, baby... keep on truckin!! And I will continue to moderate my comments... my ego is much more fragile than yours. Much love,


taxitalk said...

fuck moderation

Anonymous said...

I bought some shorts from Wal Mart. Not short shorts though. There is nothing wrong with Wal Mart. Target is better though.


Anonymous said...

Mother is god in the eyes and hearts of all children....Knew about you before I knew about your blog. Funny how life stumbles upon things. Everyone has their own demons and skeletons in their closets. And if they say there are none then they are lying. You have the "balls" to lay it out for others and they hide behind a screen. I would put money on it that you would beat the shit outta of them more than likely. And I can say I bet they have used the services of someone also because lets face it. They are net nerds like the rest. Unless they are some teenage feeb that can't get a hooker on a bicycle,then they are pulling pud on the net. Funny how life comes around in a circle. So you go on with your bad self and know that there are fucknuts like me that get a kick out of your honesty.

Anonymous said...

agreed taxitalk.

fucknuts...that's pretty funny shit.

Anonymous said...

Sorry I must of struck a nerve or something. Didn't mean to make them self censor themselves. I should of just lurked and kept quiet. But figured this was where some hardcore flamers were at and wanted in on the shit. And now they got all quiet and shit on me. You fucking fucks. You fucking fuckitty fuck fuck fucks.

Anonymous said...

I had to clean out a "dead friends trailer". He OD'ed on Fent-patches. Easy to do chasing the ghost. What was wild was that i found a big fucking bag of what turned out to be Tar. We always had good powder in Richmond, I never had any tar except that one time I found his. Another friend told me he had bought that like 2 days earlier and could not get it to dissolve (duh) so he thought he got ripped. We never did get his freaking trailer cleaned out, but we did stay wasted for 2 days. I thought the tar was better than the powder.

Seeya SoFla, I bet it is hot as shit down there. We had snow the other day.

DharmaBum -n- Colorado

Michelle said...

Tar sucks! East coast dope rules!